This is your captain speaking...

Ok, so if you are relatively new here please understand that a large majority of my emails have nothing to do with buttons, but more of a collection of random stories in my life.  Like the guy who mailed live chickens at the post office, or the inmate who sent me a detailed love letter to my job.  Click HERE to read those stories... but anyway

 

So last Sunday my husband and I were on a 5am flight from Vegas to Houston.  He sat by the window and I was in the middle seat.

On the row in front of us there was a man also sitting in the window seat who had boarded prior to us.  

A lady with long braids in a bun comes down the aisle and asks the man "Is anyone sitting here" he says "no" so she sits in the middle seat and her annoying AF homegirl sits in the aisle seat. (Story on Louie Vuitton luggage girl another day).

 

So the plane takes off and they are making small talk.  I get my snacks and ginger ale and then all of a sudden they are tongue kissing each other DOWN!.  I guess on the new Southwest planes they have made the gap between the seats larger so I had a full on in my face view of these two swapping spit. 

 

Later, the guy pulls out a blanket, snuggles up in the blanket and puts his head against the window. The lady puts her head on his shoulder to snuggle up against him, THEN proceeds to put her head in his lap under the blanket.  Just know that sis went down with her braids in a bun, but came up with them braids in her face.  

 

All I am thinking is.. fawk... this whole plane is about to smell like ass. 

 

Now this is where is gets worse.

I assumed that they knew each other, but my husband pointed out the facts that 

1. They didn't board together 

and 

2. She asked if anyone had taken that seat. 

 

But then!!! The plane lands, we get off and walk towards the restroom.  The lady, her friend and the guy are all standing together.  The lady gives him a huge hug, and proceeds to introduce the guy to her friends and then says... "call me".

 

FLATLINE...DEAD...PICK ME UP OFF THE FLOOR OF HOBBY AIRPORT!

 

I wonder if ole girl gets my emails. 

 

Have a great Monday!

xoxo Nzingah